To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
