Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
