capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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