don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
