did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
