Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
