I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
