Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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