Having a random hookup so left but love u
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Randomize
