You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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