Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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