You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
