ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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