i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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