There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
