Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
