she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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