i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
