Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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