when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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