oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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