a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize