yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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