Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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