i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
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