yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
