hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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