its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
