Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
