I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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