somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize