I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
