2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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