you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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