i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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