Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I deserve this hangover.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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