Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
