just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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