But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
