About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
