Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
