I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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