Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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