I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
