lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
a search helicopter?!
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
