You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Your face is a jimmy john
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
