she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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