I am puke
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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