He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
