Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
